You know how Baseball and Football scouts and recruiters

visit games and practices of the players, looking for talent? Well, why don’t lit agents make the rounds at coffee shops and public libraries? Perhaps stopping by my table, and asking, “Hey, man, whatcha workin’ on?” and smiling as I turn my macbook around to face him, revealing my Word document with thousands of words. And then as he skims I briefly explain the premise, how the characters developed, and maybe throwing in wry remarks about my personal life, so that he or she can get a fuller sense of who I really am.

I mean, I don’t know many, or really any literary agents, but it seems like it would benefit them to be proactive in finding new writers. Ones like me who have no problem writing things like novels, but can’t for the life of himself write a query letter or author bio.

Umm, hello?

Trying to write this thing about Ghostbusters

for The Neave but I’ve had all this coffee and I’ve got a million things on my mind. Not bad things, just things, one million of them. Also there are like, babes here. Crawling. This place is crawling with them. I can’t focus. Disregard this.

I really appreciate bars/restaurants/coffee shops that require a “Why do you want to work here” proposal

when applying for a job. Like last week, I applied for this bar job and wrote about my 3 favorite beers (didn’t hear back). Today I sent in another one, this time for this cafe. Here’s what I wrote concerning my favorite beverage:

Hi, my name’s Michael, and I saw your ad, and your cafe seems like an amazing place to work. I just moved to the city and am free anytime (literally). My favorite beverage is probably beer, because it (like coffee) it is incredibly diverse. The umbrella word of Beer spans so many different flavors, cultures, and even textures. It’s the same for coffee. My favorite coffee, is probably a drip brewed (gravity, not machine) cup of fresh roasted beans, but I also love Red Eyes, for the obvious caffeine factor.

Coffee, like beer is an excellent group activity—it’s a culture. For example, in Naples, Italy, one thing I find fascinating is caffè sospeso, which is literally a coffee in suspense. A patron orders 2 and leaves one in suspense for someone homeless, or down on their luck. It’s things like that that draw folks into a community, and make everyone feel at home.

In my spare time I read, and write. Specifically, two blogs, listed below. The first, a personal, humorous blog, and the second a relationship oriented blog with 15 thousand subscribers, with hopes to be published one day.

I would greatly appreciate a  chance to interview for a position, as I feel I have the enthusiasm, talent and drive to add to your business.

Thanks.

So yeah. I really wanna work basically anywhere, but it’s always cool to see places hiring who obviously have a passion for what they do. Brooklyn Lyceum Cafe, if you’re reading this, please hire me, you won’t regret it!

Locked the screen door, oh boy…

One more day of work (tomorrow) until I’m completely free for a very long time.

But more in the present, what’s the proper 2010 vernacular for Irishing up my coffee? I mean, since I’m using Jim Beam, which is no such proper substitute for a fine Irish Whisky. It’s gonna be a tough year, this one - if we can’t get this stuff straight.

Plans for today? Take out the trash.

Also, new followers. Welcome, and how do you do?

Took it upon myself,

To go and buy a coffee pot, you know, the drip kind, because I was tired of the french press.

So I come home around 8 and put a fresh pot on, 12 whole cups!

Well, 8 cups later, and 10 more pages written I’m fucking wired and watching Californication and now, oh now I’ve found 4 beers in my fridge and I’m trying to kill the coffee buzz with the lady toasting on the moon.

Bad decisions, tumblrs, bad news.

As I drove out of Bradenton this afternoon, in my beat up chevy the lyrics to Belle & Sebastian’s “Get Me Away From Here, I’m dying” came rushing back, and not in a good way.

I keep staring at this map of the united states on my wall, I picture the cities that you’re in, and picture myself driving to your city, and re-blogging your most recent posts and saying, “hey, man, I’m here, yeah - here, in your town!”

And then you unfollow me, and I drive to the next town. Thing is, I don’t start in Florida and work my way up and out, I’m just driving across, back and forth.